On embracing the finiteness of our time
Top of Mind 2.13.24
COOKING Roasted Cauliflower with Creamy Pesto Pasta
LISTENING Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals
BUYING 2-player Catan for date nights
RECOMMENDING this convertible car seat is the one to get
REFLECTING You cannot do it all. Not this week. Not next week. Not ever.
Currently….
If patience is a virtue, then anyone with a toddler has probably felt at some point like the least virtuous person on the planet. Whether it's mealtimes, bedtimes or getting-out-the-door times, I often find myself internally screaming, "I'm over it!" (although let’s be real… it's gone from internal to external rather fast depending on my mood). But now? Now, I take a deep breath and think to myself, "How lucky am I to get to experience this?"
This perhaps sounds like one of those overly optimistic affirmations that people with organized sock drawers and alphabetized spice racks tell you to try. But here's the thing: it works.
While listening to a book recently recommended to me, Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals, a little lightbulb flickered on in my mind. The book, all about embracing the finiteness of our time, somehow grounded me — made me see my everyday struggles through a different lens.
So here's a slice of my life from before this shift and after:
Pre-Shift:
It's bedtime—again. Caden is performing the nightly ritual of purging every stuffed animal from the bed, demanding milk - not too cold, not too warm - then, of course, needing the bathroom right after finally tucking in. I’m begrudgingly tickling his back for what feels like the one hundred and tenth minute since bedtime began, praying I can sneak away without a fight in “two more minutes,” thinking about all the other things that could be more productive to do during this time.
Post-Shift:
Bedtime is still the same tactical operation, but as Caden orchestrates the perfect location of his animal friends in bed, critiques the temperature of his milk, and begs for 8 more minutes of back rubs as I lay next to him, I remind myself, "How lucky am I to be needed this much, to be loved this hard, to get to cuddle in bed together." It doesn't make each night any shorter, but it sure makes the minutes feel less heavy, more filled with something precious.
Here's why this mantra has worked for me:
Perspective. Instead of seeing a challenge, I see a privilege.
Presence. This shift snaps me back to the present. I stop racing through the moment.
Patience. What once was a countdown to freedom is now an exercise in mindfulness.
But let’s keep it real. Obviously, there are days when this mindset shift can’t pivot the most-exhausted of thoughts. But it certainly helps lighten the mood, even for a few minutes.
Try it next time you're in a frustrating situation. Ground yourself with a "How lucky am I," and watch how, bit by bit, your patience grows.
All The Things
Our annual “no-kids” vacation starts Saturday. Here’s what I’m packing for Cabo. Shop the full edit.
Everlane Box Cut Tshirt the only white T you need
Patch Pocket Jean Shorts love the pocket detail
Lululemon Align Dupe bra & Shorts looking cute for the hotel gym
One Piece Swimsuit its giving Hunza G vibes without the price tag
High waisted bikini super flattering swimsuit
Straw Hat the hat that looks good on literally everyone
Way High Drape Pant an effortless pant for evenings
What’s New
Thanks for the continued support on this journey,
Barbara Mighdoll